The Dreams with the Women and the Galoshes

For the record, before I even begin this post, I’d like to let you all know that my 4 week dry spell ended on Sunday night. Thank the heavens. I might be a hugely pregnant woman, but I’m still a woman. I have needs for goodness sake. And also for the record, sex while 9 months pregnant can be highly awkward, but if you find your groove, it’s the best sex EVER.

(Also, if you know me personally and are reading this, I’m sorry if that makes you uncomfortable. You may leave now, or continue reading. It’s your choice. I hate to offend anyone with talk of my sex life, but this is MY outlet, remember?)

Ahem.

For about a week there, I was having very very sexual dreams. They were very, uhh, VIVID. And also sexual. Did I mention that they were sexual? They were explicit to the point of making me uncomfortable, which is no easy feat, unless you are talking about physical discomfort, which is very easy to achieve. The weirdest part of all of these dreams? They did not involve actual “intercourse” per se, and they involved women. Which could be why the “intercourse” part was out. Although one of the dreams involved a friend of mine (one of my oldest friends ever) and she did have a penis. Uh huh. Yeah, that made me HIGHLY uncomfortable. Others involved a lot of nudity and masturbation. The last sex dream I had was on Friday night. I confided in Ryan about them, and he chalked it up to hormones, which I know is highly plausible. Also having no sex for a while might have had something to do with it.

Finally I had a non-sex dream on Saturday. I had a dream that I had a c-section by some doctor that I’d never met before. The weird part? All of my friends were in the room as I was being cut open. I didn’t even question what had happened to me until I saw the stitched up incision across my belly, and then I was like, “but that’s not how I wanted it to happen!!!”

The nursery dressed my baby up in a baby raincoat and galoshes. And also sunglasses. On the name tag it said “Baby Cool.”

Uhhh. Ok.

So far this week I haven’t had any hormone induced dreams, and I hope it stays that way. Pregnancy dreams are by far the weirdest, most vivid dreams ever. And I have pretty animated dreams to begin with. I’m looking forward to my dreams dulling down. I'm also looking forward to getting some sleep tonight, since I was wide awake this morning at 3 and unable to fall asleep again. Mommy basic training, I suppose.

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