Wednesday, August 17, 2005

Just a little squirt into the coffee, mom... thanks.

This scares me.

Something about my kid saying "mommy's boob tastes good" gets to me... I just don't know...

Believe me, I'm an advocate of breastfeeding. I think all women should do it, it's the best thing for your baby, yada yada yada. Whip your boob out in public for all I care. As my Lamaze instructor said, what would you rather have, store bought cookies or homemade cookies made from scratch? That's the comparison between breast milk and formula, and I think it's a good one. I plan on giving my kid the homemade cookies. But the moment my kid tells me, "I like your breast milk better than ice cream!" I know it's time to quit.

In this article it mentions kids from 48 months (ok... I can deal with that) to 78 months. SEVENTY-EIGHT MONTHS. That's like, what, 6 and a half? I'm sorry. Isn't your kid in FIRST GRADE???? If your kid has friends over is he or she going to offer them a snack, oh say, maybe some cookies and uh, YOU?

Not to mention the TEETH.

This freaks me out. When do these women quit breastfeeding their children? If you’ve gone that long, how do you know when to draw the line? Kids grow teeth because their bodies are capable of obtaining nourishment in other ways, like oh, solid food, maybe? And the thing that freaks me out the most is that older kids are going to have memories of sucking on their mom’s boob! That’s not a memory I personally want my kid to have. But that’s because I want the fuzz to be normal. And I want a normal relationship with my husband, who also happens to be a fan of my boobs.

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My doctor appointment last night sucked. The nurse was a bitch. “You’re due for your Pap… is that ok?” “Uh… I guess-“ “Good.” I wasn’t mentally prepared for the Pap thing. A little warning would have been nice. I had a strange doctor, which is nothing out of the ordinary, I’m supposed to meet the entire practice before I go have the kid, because it could be any one of them that delivers. This doctor was weird and kept babbling to me the whole time. Plus we had to wait 45 minutes before he actually came in the room. Sitting there with no pants on for 45 minutes is NOT FUN. Not only did I not get another ultrasound, but I have to take another goddamn glucose test. I’m gaining weight very rapidly. Of course in the past 2 weeks, a majority of it has been water weight. I’m swollen beyond belief. I have cankles. My wedding ring doesn’t fit. My face even looks chubby. I can’t possibly imagine how much more I’m going to gain in the next 2 and a half months. I can’t even bring myself to say how much I’ve gained out loud. It makes me sick. And I honestly don’t know where it’s all coming from, because I really don’t eat that much. Gah.

I have Lamaze to look forward to tonight though.

The strange week continues…

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