Wednesday, September 06, 2006

First Night

First things first, Suri is a damn cute baby. Too cute, even. I’d like to see pictures of her crawling on the floor eating dirt like my kid does, then I’ll be satisfied.

Last night was my first night without Lyric. She stayed at my mom’s house because Ryan and I went down to Pittsburgh for the Black Label Society CD listening party. That was fun. There’s nothing quite like a bunch of metalheads in one small, concentrated area. There’s sure to be exposed boobs along the way, and there certainly was. The biggest ones I’ve ever seen, live and in person, and I knew the person attached to them, but that’s a story for later.

Anyway, I grudgingly gave up my child for a night out at the Hardrock Café, and it was kind of cool. We got to meet Nick Cantanese, who I made sign an autograph for Lyric (hey, she’s a fan… she was at Ozfest, remember?). He was nice, although I think he mistakenly thought he was signing an autograph for an unborn child, as he rubbed my belly afterward. I took no offense, since I do have a poochy belly leftover from the stint that Lyric spent living in there, and told Ryan that Nick had anointed my womb, and our next child is destined to be a guitar player, perhaps the “evil triplet” (you have to read the wiki on Nick to understand that reference).

Anyhoo, as he was doing a Q&A, a girl named Becca told him that she’d flash her huge size F tits for a set of patches, which is something you can’t just get from BLS, you have to be “cool” to get them. It’s like a gay gang thing. Whateva. So she repeatedly flashed her enormous boobs like, 5 times. I watched her thinking, “boy that face is familiar.” Yeah, her face. I noticed it, believe it or not. Later on, I was walking past the bar and she grabbed me and said, “Hey E-Lo!” We did a sort of, “don’t I know you” type of questioning, and I discovered that when I was a grad student, I worked in one of her classes, and I taught her how to do digital video editing. She told me that she had gone on to work for CBS and Fox, but had to quit because she couldn’t deal with looking at raw news footage all day. I’d be all over that shit, but whateva! Anyway, NOW she and her fiancé make adult videos for people.

Christ.

I was telling Ryan that she worked for CBS and Fox and he said, “you should be proud!”
“Why?”
“Cause you taught her.”
“Oh. Well, she doesn’t do that anymore.”
“So? It’s still cool.””What’s even cooler is now she makes pornos.”
“Sweet!”

I taught her the EDITING part.

Enormous boobs.

Her boyfriend does “stripper karaoke” too. That’s right. Stripper karaoke. Only the best KIND of karaoke!


It was interesting.


So my job interview was this morning and it went famously. I’m meeting with the vice president of business development next week, so I’m moving right along. Thanks for all the prayers, thoughts, and support. I think I have this in the bag.

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