Tuesday, May 03, 2005


Why is it that suddenly since I’m pregnant, everyone wants to just pile the pressure on me? Here’s a few wonderful examples:

1. My dad. Of all people, with his huge “I’m carrying triplets” beer belly, asked me the other day how much weight I’ve gained. Now, I don’t know what you guys think, but I think it’s rude to ask someone, pregnant or not, how much weight they’re gaining! I know I’ve talked about this many many times before, but I have serious issues with my body and my weight. I know I’m an average sized person, I might be a tad overweight for my height, I wear a size 12, which I’m ok with. I’ve always felt so much bigger than I am. I’ve had to return clothes tons of times because I bought sizes that were way too big, but I seriously thought that they’d fit. At the beginning of the year I went through all my too big clothes and got rid of them, and let me tell you, there were a lot. I know exactly why I have issues with my body and my weight: it’s from my parents. I have an older sister who is majorly overweight, probably even what would be considered “morbidly obese.” That’s a terrible phrase to be classified as. She’s a lot older than me, and although we share the same dad, we have different moms. Her mom is the same shape and size as her, and my mom is tiny and petite, but her sister and my cousin are very similar to my size, with a wide butt and hips and round belly. My whole life my dad has been saying, “you don’t want to end up like your sister,” which in my opinion, is not only terrible to say to me, it’s terrible to say about her. I get most of my vanity from my dad, who as you can see, judges people by their looks. Fortunately, I don’t do that. My dad actually DARED to say this to me on the phone yesterday, when I told him the typical woman gains anywhere from 25 to 35 pounds when she’s pregnant, give or take depending on her size. “The more you gain, the harder it’s going to be for you to lose!” I was like, ok, dickhead. Thanks for the advice, since you have a penis and all your kids were born before the mid 80’s. Don’t worry about me, I’m going to have a baby that’s not low birth weight, like both me and my brother were (I weighed in at a whopping 4.5 pounds). DON’T FUCK WITH A PREGNANT WOMAN ABOUT HER WEIGHT!

2. My boss feels like it’s necessary for me to get graphic design training because our graphic designer is going to be out of town for 2 days at the end of the week. So if anything happens that needs an emergency graphic, guess who has to do it? I’ve worked as a graphic designer for years, but I don’t know, nor do I want to know, how this guy does it. I don’t want to know how to create our web pages, or how to upload graphics to our website. I can do that at home on my own. The last thing I need right now is ANY MORE STRESS, THANK YOU VERY MUCH!

3. I mentioned that my thesis advisor and I had struck a deal about the completion of my thesis. In order to do that, I have to go to Clarion someday next week, which is finals week, and present it. Not only do I not have time to create a presentation, none of my committee has gotten back to me on WHEN I can do it. They all know I just started this job, and they all know that I need to know in advance if I need a day off. This is supposed to happen NEXT WEEK and I STILL DON’T KNOW WHEN.

4. My house smells like onions.

5. I’m eating Cheetos again and GAINING MORE WEIGHT.

6. I’m generally pissed off today.

Boy, I'm a barrel of laughs lately.

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