Tuesday, November 15, 2005

The Itchy and Scratchy Show

In case you were wondering, I’m still pregnant. Now shut up.

I’m very cranky, very emotional, and VERY itchy. In the past few days I’ve developed a weird ass skin condition known as PUPPP, or the less pronounceable Pruritic Uticarial Papules and Plaques of Pregnancy. It’s like a really hivey outbreak. They say that it’s caused by an allergic reaction to the placenta. It usually occurs in late pregnancy and is pretty rare. So leave it to me to get it. It should clear up as soon as I give birth, WHENEVER THAT WILL BE. At any rate, my itchiness is increasing my bitchiness. It’s not nice to have a giant bumpy rash getting worse daily all over my body. Thankfully it’s not dangerous to me or the Fuzz, it’s just really motherfucking uncomfortable. So much so that all I want to do is tear my skin off. Now I can really sympathize with Ryan for dealing with eczema his whole life. Unfortunately, the only thing I can do about it is put on hydrocortisone. And try not to scratch. I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy. Seriously.

I’m the most miserable creature on the face of the earth at the moment. How do women forget these days and continue to have multiple children? How is it even possible?

I told Ryan that when our baby is crying non-stop and I'm on the brink of insanity, to look at me and say, "at least you're not itchy!"

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