Some of you may remember about a year ago when I was unemployed and my brother was in a car accident – my “friend” offered me an interview with her employer. They hired me, and I rejected the job because the pay sucked and there were no benefits. After that, my “friend” – who was at one time someone I called my “best friend” quit talking to me. She never called me to see if my brother was alive, never wished my baby a happy first birthday, nothing. Nada. Whatever. No skin off my back, because personally, I had felt our friendship faltering for some time. We had become incredibly different people – actually she stayed the same and I kind of evolved into someone more mature and responsible, what with motherhood and all forcing me to do so.
I hadn’t seen her since, that is, until this past weekend. I saw her in passing at the same bar on Saturday, and I honestly felt like it was a scene out of the lamest of the lame high school movies. She went out of her way – without actually making any contact with me whatsoever – to show me that she had other friends, that she was having fun, and it was all very rude and obnoxious and immature. It reminded me of how she used to get jealous when we’d go out together and guys would hit on me. She’d come up to me and act like she was my girlfriend to try to convince whoever that we were lesbians. I hated that then, and I have absolutely no time for it now.
My life, while not perfect, has gotten considerably better in the past year. I have two jobs that are rewarding in many ways, friends, both old and new, that I love, a daughter that fills my life with extreme joy, and a husband who is my foundation. I have a home, a wonderful and supportive family – and I don’t have to act like my life is all peaches and cream all the time. Because for the most part, I’m happy.
Whether she really is or not, I probably will never know.
I’ve got to admit, I’ve thought about her in the past year, many times with a small amount of sad regret because of the friendship that we once had. At the same time, I’m glad to have moved beyond that point in my life. I guess almost everyone has had toxic friendships in their past – people that you don’t really like who you become when you’re around them. And I have to admit, I never really liked who I was around her. I just never really knew it.
Que sera sera.