tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74351522024-03-06T23:04:27.840-05:00Squirrel StoriesRarely updated, very duplicated.E-Lohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09944480320326163348noreply@blogger.comBlogger608125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7435152.post-18295518351120751462020-04-02T16:06:00.000-04:002020-04-02T16:06:06.234-04:00COVID-19 Diary - day 20WTF.<br />
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I think I've done a pretty good job of staying calm through the shit storm that is 2020. My husband would probably disagree but he disagrees with me about everything these days (which makes stressful situations all the more fun!). As a work from home (thankfully) mom, who is now "home schooling" her kids, I can honestly say my nerves have been great for my chronic constipation.<br />
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TMI? Never.<br />
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Somehow it seems like forever ago - March 12 - I picked Fallon up from school and went to the eye doctor, got Starbucks, picked Lyric up from track practice, then headed to pick up some friends of the girls and went to the carnival at Fallon's school. That was our last day of normal. But even then, I could feel it in the air. The lingering nervousness. School functions are usually packed, but that night, the crowd was sparse. I let the girls have what I knew was probably going to be their last night of fun, a sleepover with friends before the insanity started. The next day was Friday, a teacher in-service day, and they announced that school would be cancelled for the next two weeks.<br />
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Two weeks have come and gone, and a stay at home order is in effect for Pennsylvania. It doesn't look like school will be back in session this year.<br />
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At one point, I went to 9 stores over two days just to find some toilet paper.<br />
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I'd kill a man for a container of Clorox wipes. Or hand sanitizer for in my car.<br />
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I had to run to the grocery store today to grab some stuff that we were out of and as I was driving home, I noticed all the school buses parked at the bus garage. On a Thursday. And it made me super emotional. I feel like everything makes me cry lately. I'm perfectly fine social distancing - I love not interacting with people. I'm mostly just sad for my kids and the interruption to their school year and routine, the people out of jobs because of this bullshit illness, and mostly, the people who are sick or have died or have lost loved ones. I wonder if life will ever be normal again, or will I always hold my breath when I walk into a public place without realizing it, or slather my hands in hand sanitizer every time I leave a store.<br />
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I can only pray it passes quickly or that we all settle in to our new normal.E-Lohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09944480320326163348noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7435152.post-36456235115964336492020-03-12T12:42:00.001-04:002020-03-12T12:42:15.334-04:00My CoronaSince we're kind of living in history right now, I thought a post was warranted. Dude, can you believe this shit? Coronavirus is cray cray. I dig science and I'm always going to err on the side of facts and stats and stuff you can't argue, but there are always inevitably going to be those who nay say. Naysay? I'm not sure which is correct. Siri? Well crap, she gave me the word "nisei, which is a person born in the US or Canada whose parents were immigrants from Japan. NO.<br />
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Anywho, I find myself in the in between - there's the "OMG WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE BUY ALL THE TOILET PAPER" peeps - and then there's the "FAKE NEWS TRUMP SAID WE'RE FINE BECAUSE THE UNITED STATES IS THE BEST AT MEDICINE USA USA USA" people. I'm in the "don't panic, but be prepared" camp, personally. I've always been kind of a hippie - I like taking the natural route. I don't scrub my house down with Clorox or spray the furniture with Lysol - I burn incense and diffuse lavender and frankincense (I like how it smells, mostly). I have salt lamps in several rooms and I do yoga for my mental health (I know it doesn't work for everyone, but it sort of works for me). I've recently tried meditation, but my mind doesn't have an off switch, so it's really hard. I need to keep trying, because my mental load it's no wonder, but that's definitely a post for another day. If I die of COVID-19 promise you'll help my family keep track of their shit because lord knows they'll be lost.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHWYhLfLt5O9zoOzh6Ag5vqS4XiNj542oD1nBKgBxcsOV7dwzhbOs03qo_6Bf8483cIWgZn0Q3xBuTiTsUZNqvaHB5ha9sSCk3j6bG_UTG5nfRSuamAcBqp9r8QUA81tzGg-lK/s1600/when-im-asked-why-im-not-worried-about-the-mandatory-70307709.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="477" data-original-width="500" height="305" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHWYhLfLt5O9zoOzh6Ag5vqS4XiNj542oD1nBKgBxcsOV7dwzhbOs03qo_6Bf8483cIWgZn0Q3xBuTiTsUZNqvaHB5ha9sSCk3j6bG_UTG5nfRSuamAcBqp9r8QUA81tzGg-lK/s320/when-im-asked-why-im-not-worried-about-the-mandatory-70307709.png" width="320" /></a>Social media makes things so hard. I hate judging my friends when they post something that I disagree with or find ridiculous. But I also don't want to argue. I have an elderly mom with heart problems who is susceptible. I have a child with asthma. I know most people will be fine, but those are the same people who go out in public when they're sick, thinking "I'm good!" while spreading their germs all over people like my mom and my kid. So excuse me for worrying a bit.<br />
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There are talks of our schools shutting down next week - tomorrow (Friday) is an act 80 day for the kids, but I have a feeling the teacher meetings are going to turn into how to quickly put online lesson plans together. Of course, we'll have the "THAT'S RIDICULOUS" camp. I can sympathize - if I were still working in an office I might be a little panicky too. Thankfully I work from home full time (an introverts dream) so I don't worry as much about school shutting down.<br />
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My husband (unbeknownst to me) made plans for us to go out for St. Patricks Day this weekend. Mind you, he's also in the "MEDIA SENSATIONALISM" camp. I'm in the cautious social distancing camp, so this should be interesting.<br />
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What camp are you in? Does this freak you out? Do you think we'll be ok by summer? Or will my years of watching the Walking Dead prepare me for a real life apocalyptic situation? Time will tell.<br />
<br />E-Lohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09944480320326163348noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7435152.post-75661970011051727062020-03-03T20:17:00.002-05:002020-03-03T20:17:45.674-05:00I'm not dead yetSo lately I've been thinking. I know, I know - what the fuck, E-Lo, you just come back here after a year or more and even more before that and start typing shit out like this is your own personal stream of consciousness. Oh wait, that's kind of what it's always been. Anyway, as I was saying - I was thinking about how much I loved writing here. I felt like I was good at it. I read some of my old posts today and I laughed. I was funny! Or maybe I just crack myself up. Either way, it's good to be good at something. Or be your own biggest fan.<br />
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So, blogger hasn't changed much, right? I've done a whole hell of a lot of web stuff over the past 15 or so years. I think I refreshed the look of this place in 2009. It might be time for an update. THAT should be easy peasy.<br />
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It's been almost 15 years since I <a href="http://squirrelstories.blogspot.com/2005/03/tuesday-pre-menstrual-shorts_08.html" target="_blank">posted about my boobs growing</a> - that girl had no idea. There are times I'd like to go back in time and swat that fucking Snickers bar out of my hand. Not fat shaming, but damn girl, slow down. Pregnancy was my excuse to eat like shit. My body has never recovered. Back then, at 27, it seemed like I had all the time in the world, but little did I know how busy life with kids makes you. Hence this blog falling by the wayside for a gazillion years.<br />
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I recently (like three days ago) started journaling. Mainly like gratitude type shit. Like, hey, I'm fucking thankful, ok. Because I am. Life is good. Write it down. But this was my place to tell stories, and I want to get back into that.<br />
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So if you stumble across this post and used to read my blog, hold me accountable, ok? Writing isn't exactly something I do a lot of these days, and it's weird to think I was better at it 15 years ago. But practice makes... better. I'll never be perfect.<br />
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See yinz soon!E-Lohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09944480320326163348noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7435152.post-30971698158929225152018-05-17T08:43:00.000-04:002018-05-17T08:43:03.485-04:00Cough. Cough, cough, COUGH.<br />
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SNEEZE.<br />
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Wow, there's a thick layer of dust here. My eyes are watering, so this will be a short one.<br />
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I've been tasked with teaching senior Girl Scouts the "website designer" badge, so I'm going to show them how to make a blog! Of course I can't share this one, because omg how embarrassing. So, because this event happens Sunday, I'm dusting off the old blog in order to show them how this all works.<br />
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Have I mentioned I've been a Girl Scout leader now for 4 years? Lyric has been in Girl Scouts for 7, and Fallon is finishing her second year. Lyric is retiring as a Girl Scout this year - she's going into seventh grade and it's no longer fun for her... which is pretty common for girls her age. It makes me sad, but we've had tons of great experiences because of Girl Scouts! Fallon will continue, although her troop is disbanding this year and she'll end up somewhere new next year... who knows, mom will probably end up helping out her new troop at some point.<br />
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My girls are growing up. Time is a crazy thing!<br />
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At least I know the blog still works, even if it's dusty as hell.E-Lohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09944480320326163348noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7435152.post-44463573550118754142012-09-04T11:35:00.000-04:002012-09-04T11:35:03.786-04:00Bellah<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">Bellah<o:p></o:p></div><div class="MsoNormal">My weekend was off the rails, yo. In a bad way. We went camping. Ryan’s dad made this UH-MAZE-ING caramel popcorn. The hull-less kind. OMG I ate the SHIT out of that stuff. I had pizza Friday night. I promptly broke out in a constellation of zits across my chin and eczema on my hand. Gluten SUCKS. I had mac and cheese. Chips. CAKE. ICE CREAM. I’m skerred to look at the scale.<o:p></o:p></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">The good news is, the shirt I’m wearing today is too big. The bad news? It’s too big. But I’m bloated as hell.<o:p></o:p></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Speaking of being bloated, I’m going to start a Pilates challenge today for the month of September. I will post before and after photos, which I guarantee you will be skerry as shit. There's just something about having babies that just fucks your world up. I wasn't crazy about my bellah to begin with. Needless to say, my abs/core need some help. As do I. I’m feeling absolutely miserable today. I don’t want to be at work. I’m cranky. I want to be at home with Fallon, cleaning my house and doing laundry. Instead I have to waste my time here, rush home to meet my mom with Lyric for Girl Scouts, and then I probably won’t GET home until almost 8. Dinner? Ha. I hope I get time to run this week. <o:p></o:p></div>E-Lohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09944480320326163348noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7435152.post-47859646140442653132012-08-28T16:15:00.000-04:002012-08-28T16:15:43.968-04:00Sum sum summertime... ends!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiz31eTWiE67WMEFNAGNwbs5JjsAsPjbYwmMlmlgiDmYLLI7KLTtQXgNzYI9IgSQw1ermjzJKM-rQuBP0XiTEQII9V8QPVIXRQ3Q1GAMpkk1fZMFHOaszsxY7n8qlPLJ_SzcPZR/s1600/IMG_0104.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiz31eTWiE67WMEFNAGNwbs5JjsAsPjbYwmMlmlgiDmYLLI7KLTtQXgNzYI9IgSQw1ermjzJKM-rQuBP0XiTEQII9V8QPVIXRQ3Q1GAMpkk1fZMFHOaszsxY7n8qlPLJ_SzcPZR/s200/IMG_0104.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>Lyric starts first grade tomorrow. Seriously? WTF. Wasn't I JUST complaining about STILL being pregnant with her? How is it possible that she's almost 7? Why am I old? I can't believe it. I'm staying home tomorrow morning to put her on the bus, and then I'll be off to work. She loves school - I hope that trend continues. She just loves being around other kids - the learning is just a small part of it to her.<br />
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She's a super bright, active kid. Tons of energy, but she doesn't use it right. If I asked her to go for a run with me, she wouldn't, but she'd run and jump on the couch for an hour. I try to keep her as active as I can, but it's hard sometimes. She's also got a lot of little quirks - just like her mom. She can be very fearful of certain things - going upstairs by herself or touching the recycling bin because she saw a bug on it once. I was the same way, but it's hard to remember how patient my parents must have been with me when I was little. Either that, or I wasn't as expressive about my fears as Lyric is - which is probably the case. I hid a lot of stuff. I didn't want to be weird. I'm glad Lyric feels she can talk to me, I just hope she always does, and that I can be a good and patient mom. Easier said than done.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVhq3P3Eml1roQO19JscmFasstpAvRMdi_XJZzk9NT3SwRhnWz-DNExWCw5xqoHDXAuycmwnxMNeqE_YWCDTumuyhGeRxD4IHVTPXYbuG1UtlurtnfET1ru2L6Y4hcTMvhjxes/s1600/IMG_0285.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVhq3P3Eml1roQO19JscmFasstpAvRMdi_XJZzk9NT3SwRhnWz-DNExWCw5xqoHDXAuycmwnxMNeqE_YWCDTumuyhGeRxD4IHVTPXYbuG1UtlurtnfET1ru2L6Y4hcTMvhjxes/s200/IMG_0285.jpg" width="198" /></a>Fallon is a different story.<br />
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She's a wild one. My kids are pretty opposite. Except for that "excess energy" thing. They've got that much covered.<br />
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I love that Fallon is starting to talk SO much. Her language is absolutely exploding. She burps and says "scoose me!" and climbs the slide and yells "Mommy I DID IT!" It's adorable. I wish I could keep her itty bitty forevs. It's my favorite. I heart toddlers. Especially mine. It's weird when you try to love up other people's toddlers - they tend to not appreciate it much.<br />
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As for me, I'm still doing this Paleo thing. And it's working for me when nothing else would. My body simply cannot handle gluten/grains, I think. I get incredibly bloated and feel horrible. So this is a good discovery. I've lost 10 pounds this month! 5 of which I kept gaining and then losing, but now I'm finally to a weight that I haven't seen in forever, which is nice. This morning I weighed 174.6. I'm hoping to see the 160's soon - I haven't been there since 2008.<br />
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My training has been pretty loosey goosey, but oh well EFF IT. I don't think I can do this half. I don't have time for the training. If I worked closer to home, maybe. If I was still a SAMH, deff. I'm not giving up by any means, but I don't think I can do that distance when the furthest I've run is 6.3 miles. It's in a month and a half. I do want to run another 10k and even a 5k soon. I plan to do the Turkey Trot in Butler again this year - it was my first 5k and I want to beat my time from last year! Go me! I'm also anxiously awaiting a call for a job interview - please keep your fingers crossed for me. I'm pretty miserable where I am right now. If I have to make one more editable pdf I'm going to effin scream. That is all.<br />
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E-Lohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09944480320326163348noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7435152.post-79717103919411347262012-08-14T15:51:00.000-04:002012-08-14T15:51:14.683-04:00W to the FFor a week or so I've been experiencing this weird stomach pain at work. Only at work. I thought it was stress related - that I hate my job so bad that it physically makes me ill (which could be true - it's not one of the best jobs ever). Today I finally put it together. I've been eating almond butter on celery! THAT'S making me sick! I have a weird, sudden almond intolerance! Which makes complete sense, because I got REALLY sick a few weeks ago after mowing down a bunch of almonds. Like, I had to go lay down in the women's locker room at work sick. So now I need to find a new snack. I can stomach PB ok, but that's a legume, which is a Paleo No. Sad times! I was doing natural PB on my celery until I started going more Paleo. But it seems that almond is more gut irritating to me. And just plain celery isn't going to cut it.<br />
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I took a week off from running. Not that I really had a choice - I've had a swollen ankle from my injury (I still haven't gotten that taken care of) and Fallon had strep and pneumonia. I wasn't feeling the greatest either. But I'm much better now. Even though my foot was still a little iffy, I took a walk at lunch today, and ran the last leg of it and it felt GLORIOUS. If only I didn't have to go back to work - I might have ran another hour and 20 minutes. *snicker*<br />
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I'm down another pound this week! Woot!E-Lohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09944480320326163348noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7435152.post-59970274558563614212012-08-10T11:43:00.004-04:002012-08-10T11:47:40.655-04:00Cavegirl can't run<span style="font-family: inherit;">Ok, so I talked a little bit about doing the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paleolithic_diet" target="_blank">Paleo</a> thing last time. I'm about 85% there - I have yet to fully eliminate dairy (I love cream in my coffee, although <a href="http://www.sodeliciousdairyfree.com/" target="_blank">So Delicious</a> makes a wonderful coconut milk creamer, but it's hard to find in my town - go figure), and I haven't yet eliminated artificial sweetner (I've been using Ideal, which is a <span style="background-color: white;"><a href="http://www.xylitol.org/questions-about-xylitol" target="_blank">xylitol sweetner</a> - basically made of plant sugar alchohol) which is a Paleo No. And yes, grass fed beef is hard to come by around my area (strange with so many farms, right?), so I try to stick with lean meats. I've lost a few lbs since last week, so that makes me happy. And I feel pretty good. This way of eating makes a lot of sense to me. Can I get the whole family on board? Probably not. But I'll do what I can.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;"><br />
</span></span> <span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;">So I had a 10K last Saturday and it was sort of a disaster. I will say I've only ever ran in one race before - a 5K. I thought 3 weeks of training and only two 6 mile runs would suffice. It did not. First things first - I slipped and fell on Friday night and initially, while writhing on the floor in pain, thought I broke my ankle. After a minute I was able to limp around, but my foot HURT. It still hurt in the morning, but felt better with my running shoes on, since it had some support. So there was that. Also, it was INCREDIBLY hot and humid that morning, and while my pace for my first mile was good - about a 10 minute mile, which is fantastic for me, I quickly slowed down. Then slowed down more. And by my third mile at the turnaround point, I was walking the whole way back. I literally felt like I was going to pass out from the heat, so I didn't want to push myself. The downside of that? There were only 38 people racing. And guess who came in last at 1:21 with a pace of </span></span>13:12/M<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">? The only thing that kept me going was the thought of a banana and some gatorade at the finish. I literally collapsed into the dirt when I was done. I've never been so exhausted or sweaty in my life. Even Lyric told me I stunk.</span><br />
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</span></span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">I felt so incredibly defeated, and I've been kicking myself for signing up for that half. There is NO WAY I'm going to be ready in time. Great attitude, right? But if I can't even run for a full 3 miles, I highly doubt an added 10 is going to go over well with my body. But I'll keep on keeping on with my training. Miracles occasionally happen.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span> <span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">And my foot STILL hurts. But not as bad. I'm ready to go for another run. </span>E-Lohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09944480320326163348noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7435152.post-14665506651478565922012-08-01T15:47:00.001-04:002012-08-01T15:47:41.867-04:00Carbs are the devil<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.mrj0.com/media/img/carbs_are_of_the_devil.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://www.mrj0.com/media/img/carbs_are_of_the_devil.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="MsoNormal">At least for me, I think. So I’m trying to low-carb it for a while. I’m on My Fitness Pal (elosquirrel – look me up!) and people on there are CRAZY anti-low carb. It’s so weird. I’m on the verge of saying eff it and just going full blown Paleo, but I need to read more from <a href="http://robbwolf.com/">Robb Wolf</a>.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">I’m running my 10K this weekend – I’m nervous. I’m probably going to come in dead last, but hey, at least I’ll finish, right? I took Fallon for a 6.2 mile run on Sunday and it took me an hour and a half. Sheesh. Slower than molasses, people. I just need to walk sometimes, you know? <b><span style="color: #7030a0; font-size: 7.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-no-proof: yes;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>E-Lohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09944480320326163348noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7435152.post-14822541028593056532012-07-24T15:56:00.000-04:002012-07-24T15:56:41.868-04:00(No) DoubtI went for a run the other day. It still makes me giggle/roll my eyes when I say that. I don't think I'll ever think of myself as a runner. I'm not. Right? I just "sort of" run. I'm slow. I take walk breaks. I'm still chubby. Does that equal runner? You tell me.<br />
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I'm starting to freak out about this half marathon. What was I thinking? I did 4.5 miles with Lyric riding her bike, pushing Fallon in the jogging stroller, and about died. And yes, I have a run scheduled tonight.<br />
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The nights I don't run, I try to ride my bike. I LOVE my bike. It's so fun. And I'm excited it's something I can do with Lyric - we rode 3.5 miles last night (part of it in the dark - I know she was getting freaked out). There's a trail near us that is perfect for running and biking, and most days, I itch to be there. It's where I started running, and I love it - it's my happy place. And I'm the type of person who NEEDS a happy place.<br />
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And shoes.<br />
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I'm going to take a baby step and run a 10K next weekend. We'll see how it goes.E-Lohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09944480320326163348noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7435152.post-61555865480531336402012-07-16T10:50:00.001-04:002012-07-16T10:52:39.700-04:00Just half crazy<div class="MsoNormal"><o:p><span style="font-family: inherit;"> </span></o:p><b><span style="color: #7f7f7f;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">On Friday I did something just plain NUTS and signed up for a half marathon. Holy shit, internet – what did I just do? Ok, so last year I started running. Pretty amazeballs considering I’ve never been athletic, and after being a smoker for too many years, I had no idea I could even attempt to run. But I did it – I completed the Couch to 5K program last fall and ran my first 5K on November 12 – just a few days after Fallon’s first birthday. It was such an awesome feeling of accomplishment – even if my time was pretty sucky – it was somewhere around 37 minutes. I’m not a fast runner by any means. Sometimes I feel like I could walk faster than I run. And then I just stopped. And I’d go for a random jog here and there – but nothing to keep myself in running shape.</span></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><span style="color: #7f7f7f;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I’m stupid. <o:p></o:p></span></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><span style="color: #7f7f7f;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">So now it’s like I’m doing the couch to half-marathon training – luckily I have about 12 weeks to get my ass back into shape. I’m hoping this time will yield me some weight loss. When I was running before, I felt great – I didn’t really lose weight, but I wasn’t really watching my diet that well either. Now I’m kind of obsessive about what I eat, but I suck at staying consistent with my diet on the weekends – I go off the rails. I need to have a goal – and I remember last year when I first started running, I saw pictures from this half marathon and thought – I bet I could run that next year! <o:p></o:p></span></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><span style="color: #7f7f7f;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Yeah… about that…<o:p></o:p></span></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><span style="color: #7f7f7f;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I started training yesterday – Sundays are going to be my long runs/walks (cause I can’t run for an hour straight just yet). I have a gym at my new job, so treadmill access is a good thing on super hot days. This race is in October – yay for fall. I just have to stick to my schedule and keep going.<o:p></o:p></span></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><span style="color: #7f7f7f;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Is it weird that I haven’t told my husband yet? I’m afraid he’s going to laugh at me. Or scoff. I remember telling him I signed up for my 5K and he told me I’d never do it. I SHOWED HIM. And I’ll do it again!</span><span style="font-size: 7pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></b></div>E-Lohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09944480320326163348noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7435152.post-38579803432726083602012-07-10T10:34:00.000-04:002012-07-10T10:34:07.651-04:00So it always starts out like this –<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #7f7f7f; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-no-proof: yes; mso-themecolor: text1; mso-themetint: 128;">I’m fat. There, I said it. Ok, maybe not as fat as some people. But I’m 30
pounds over where I want to be, and that’s a lot. And I can’t get it to MOVE. I
started running last year. RUNNING! 3 days a week – and going from nothing to 3
days a week of running is something. I started the C25K in August, and ran my
first 5K in November. You know how much weight I lost? NADA. Zilch. Zero. Zip.
Although my pants fit a little better. That’s something, right?</span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="color: #7f7f7f; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-no-proof: yes; mso-themecolor: text1; mso-themetint: 128;">I took a hiatus from running over the winter, and I was pretty amazed at
how easy it is to fall out of shape. And yup, it’s summer again, and I can’t
run a mile without walking – again. So I’m trying to get back into running
shape. I’m also trying to eat in a way that doesn’t resemble a bovine. Although
if I was a grass fed bovine, that wouldn’t be so bad, right?<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="color: #7f7f7f; font-size: 8.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-no-proof: yes; mso-themecolor: text1; mso-themetint: 128;">I had my thyroid checked a few weeks ago, because I have the symptoms of
being hypothyroid. My results came back normal. WHAT. So I’m stumped. I did
Weight Watchers for two months, religiously tracking, and lost NOTHING. I’m not
sure what I’m missing. I’m just TIRED of feeling this way. Feeling shitty.
Feeling like my pants are way too tight. Looking in the mirror and hating what
I see. It sucks. So I’m laying it out on the line. I need motivation,
inspiration, and the will to do this. </span></b><b><span style="color: #7f7f7f; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-no-proof: yes; mso-themecolor: text1; mso-themetint: 128;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>E-Lohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09944480320326163348noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7435152.post-34331554795542068212012-07-10T08:13:00.001-04:002012-07-10T08:13:41.208-04:00My Annual Post!Isn't that ridiculous? It's been a year. Lots of stuff happens in that amount of time. WTF, me? I suck, I'm lazy, blah, blah, blah. Oh well.<br />
<br />
So yesterday I had this nice big post written, with pictures of the kids and what we've been up to. Then my browser crashed and I lost the whole thing. EmEffer!!! But I'm still here - plugging away at life - being a mom, working a new full time job and my old part time job, and dealing with ME (which is a full time job in itself).<br />
<br />
I'll post more soon - promise. Here's a picture of Lyric and Fallon from the 4th:<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMTyP8V23xL6ULfeOKxzaggBR3ibAn2e898rLVFkesweo5gzrL2SYUwSRvg2aZZ6XnSj-PbT-I6LgwIP4xU-GZXk1nFELqIxJD4F-uunYjgBSl7W3vo4lg3jKnTENOub744qPE/s1600/IMG_0062.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMTyP8V23xL6ULfeOKxzaggBR3ibAn2e898rLVFkesweo5gzrL2SYUwSRvg2aZZ6XnSj-PbT-I6LgwIP4xU-GZXk1nFELqIxJD4F-uunYjgBSl7W3vo4lg3jKnTENOub744qPE/s320/IMG_0062.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />E-Lohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09944480320326163348noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7435152.post-10853874586212758132011-07-14T00:28:00.000-04:002011-07-14T00:28:29.650-04:00E-Lo Travels<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEio6JlSocsX18DMbBj6HVF_GdyAIB54hL-xGNogfJXK7KS7Tq1FlIvbBHW9ShzvxmWGuRJ_7VxUM5ZLfGr7y4DyUtsswwSe8pCesNLe8gAQ0Axv1Qh-NJDxz268an1YxKWkv9nn/s1600/006.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEio6JlSocsX18DMbBj6HVF_GdyAIB54hL-xGNogfJXK7KS7Tq1FlIvbBHW9ShzvxmWGuRJ_7VxUM5ZLfGr7y4DyUtsswwSe8pCesNLe8gAQ0Axv1Qh-NJDxz268an1YxKWkv9nn/s320/006.JPG" width="319" /></a>Friday morning I'm leaving on a jet plane. Well, Ryan and I are leaving. We're going to Seattle for a wedding and to visit friends - and we're leaving the kids home. What a strange sensation that will be. I've literally had this baby close to me every single day since February 2010. And now I'm traveling across the country. I feel like puking. The liberation makes me want to drink. A lot. Hopefully I won't be sick to my stomach the whole time because right now I feel a cold sweat coming on. I'm addicted to my children. Eeegh.<br />
<br />
Lyric is also addicted to us. She gets a little tearful about us leaving, which sucks.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQSW20opHbwThZZwG5ZPFr_0T-eKY0xgVdQEcCHTdmv4UfrepmrMtl_d1-HBM3-b0JI_EA8Jt-d4oBqKSOuB0DqzG7IvKYXpZaR6hZpGKsrn5BTJf74lg39sLjsxB2gPQC_cJ_/s1600/008.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQSW20opHbwThZZwG5ZPFr_0T-eKY0xgVdQEcCHTdmv4UfrepmrMtl_d1-HBM3-b0JI_EA8Jt-d4oBqKSOuB0DqzG7IvKYXpZaR6hZpGKsrn5BTJf74lg39sLjsxB2gPQC_cJ_/s320/008.JPG" width="319" /></a></div><br />
I'm looking at this as a well deserved break, and a chance for us to just be a married couple, and not just mom and dad. We need that. And I need a break. Did I mention that I deserve a break?E-Lohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09944480320326163348noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7435152.post-31857838226786917922011-07-05T22:12:00.003-04:002011-07-05T22:18:38.107-04:00A year in hiding...Well, almost. Give or take a month. But still.<div><br /></div><div>So, I gave birth to another girl, Fallon Ann, almost 8 months ago. It was quick and painful, but I got this chubby little bundle out of it. She's awesome. Lyric is a great big sister, and we're a happy family of 4. Fallon is now crawling and has been working on her teeth since she was 2 months. </div><div><br /></div><div><img src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIsrG4epg6Vpa-93rXjF1SN7xWBHJsx6SJ0ZcoYL6D40G2ra717bjQfZKN8Fu1yWCxSda-TaS-iJe62LpJIf5HAkeHEzwQ2ku-QfcHdvKE6BmI3O8YFCehp_2k-xuXQtPmedyo/s320/012.JPG" style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 214px; height: 320px;" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5626057745622085090" /></div><div><br /></div><div>On April 15, I lost my job of almost 5 years. I strongly feel that had I not been pregnant and had a baby, I'd still have that job. I liked my job for the most part, but since being away from it I've had nightmares that I've had to go back. So... yeah, that tells me something about just how much I really liked my job. </div><div><br /></div><div>So I'm rediscovering myself as a SAHM who collects unemployment. If only unemployment could last say, 5 years, cause that would be great. </div><div><br /></div>E-Lohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09944480320326163348noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7435152.post-1906134707527783882010-08-23T10:30:00.003-04:002010-08-23T10:36:45.684-04:00ThingsSo yeah. Wow. It's like, almost the end of August. Yup, still pregnant. Yup, everything is going well. I'm 29 weeks today. Or yesterday, or in a few days, depending on who you ask. People always ask me my due date and I'm hesitant to tell, because as I found out the last time, just because they give you a date doesn't mean you'll deliver on that date. Or by that date. Or even within a week of that date. Try 12 days. I'm hoping this little butternut comes out earlier.<br /><br />Speaking of which, what is it with people commenting on your size when you're pregnant? I get it all the FUCKING time. I hate it. I don't comment on the size of your ass, so quit commenting on mine. I've gained 30 pounds. Yes, I have. But that's not even remotely close to the SEVENTY FUCKING FIVE pounds I gained the last time, so I think I'm doing pretty damn good, thanksverymuch.<br /><br />Yeah, that's a sore subject with me. Pretty sure I had the same problem last time. Rightfully so. And chances are I'll end up weighing the same as I did when I went in to deliver Lyric. Hopefully not, but it's looking good. I mean, I'm not going on a diet. And I exercise more and eat better this time around, so it's pretty obvious my body just does whatever it wants. Or better yet, WHAT IT NEEDS TO DO to support and build a human life.<br /><br />She's a girl, by the way. Have I mentioned that? I'm so excited to be a mom to girls. Yay!E-Lohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09944480320326163348noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7435152.post-61720923884317081582010-05-18T13:49:00.002-04:002010-05-18T14:07:03.508-04:00Wrapping my head around it...So, it took a while this time, but I'm officially out of the first trimester, and dare I say it... I'm ENJOYING being pregnant. That first trimester is rough - mentally and physically. On certain days I had small mental breakdowns. On the other days I just wanted to sleep. Lyric kept me going though. I had moments where I thought - yeah, I DEFINITELY don't want to do this again. I still feel that way - I know this will be my last pregnancy and I'm still totally cool with that. But that's just more reason to sort of savor it this time.<br /><br />The difference between this pregnancy and the last is that I don't feel so completely alone. Not that I was "alone" last time - I just didn't have anyone to relate to, really. Especially at first. Now I have TONS of mommy friends and it's awesome. Another difference is that it's not a total SHOCKING lifestyle change - Lyric is a great kid, we love having her, and we know she'll be a great big sister. We also have "been there, done that," when it comes to a baby, so it's not nearly as scary. This will be a breeze.<br /><br />So I've been wrapping my brain around that for the past few months, and kind of loving it.<br /><br />Also - this kid loves to bounce on my pelvis. *thump*<br /><br />On the job front - oh, you didn't know there was a job front? Yup. I've been slowly weeding out my part time gig as an instructor - it was getting waaaaaay too stressful. Am I quitting it completely? Well... not yet. The money is nice, especially since my full time job barely pays the bills. And although I used to love my job - I'm really starting to sort of hate it lately. Maybe it's a side effect of pregnancy - or maybe because this week I'll be forced to downgrade my giant desk to a tiny cubicle - ala my old job. There I went from my own office to a desk in the middle of a room with 4 other people. So it's like an evil flashback. That and many other things (lack of a raise, more work, for one) are making me actively start looking at monster.com daily. Although I realize this is a terrible time to switch jobs. So I'll probably start being a little more active towards next January. I dream of having a work from home job. Heaven.<br /><br />Or being independently wealthy would work too.E-Lohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09944480320326163348noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7435152.post-1505891936849702512010-04-20T09:32:00.002-04:002010-04-20T09:58:22.576-04:00Well lookie here...The months have seriously been flying by this year - which is actually fantastic for me, because it brings me closer to summer and having a pool in my backyard (yay!) and because I'm PREGGO! Yup, it's in there. The Fetus. The Squirt. The Flutterbutt. I don't have a good name yet. I'm only about 11 weeks, but I feel it moving already, which my midwife said was pretty common the second time around.<br /><br />This time is much different. Not that I like being pregnant any more this time - I definitely don't. But I'm not oddly depressed. My kid keeps me active, even when I just want to crash on the couch. I'm still not thrilled about my growing body, but I haven't been thrilled with it in a few years, so nothing new there. I just hope I can be as successful this time around shedding weight as I was the first time - and KEEP it off. It was way too easy to gain back 25 pounds after I lost, oh I don't know... 74 pounds?<br /><br />Another challenge this time is not GAINING 74 pounds. Easier said than done. I'm not exactly sure how I put on that much weight - could have been the daily footlong subs or Panera bread sandwiches AND soup... plus king sized candy bars and daily ice cream. I've been really trying not to do that again and walk a few miles a day. It's just so hard because even as I type this I'm ready to fall asleep.<br /><br />Oh, and I'm nauseous this time. Not throw up nauseous, just "I feel shitty" nauseous. I didn't experience that at all last time. And my belly has already popped out this time. I'm comfortably wearing my maternity jeans.<br /><br />Next appointment - May 7th - we should be able to hear Flutterbutt's heartbeat. Hopefully I'll come up with a better name by then.E-Lohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09944480320326163348noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7435152.post-79014161427930713812010-02-01T14:50:00.000-05:002010-02-01T14:51:10.496-05:00I’ve got a Feeva...And unfortunately, the only prescription is a BEBEH in MA BELLAH. <br /><br />I’ve never gotten to experience the feeling that my biological clock was tick, tick, ticking away. And boy, now it is. In full force. It’s been a few months since we started trying, and there’s been a few bumps and potholes in an otherwise smoothly paved highway. It’s interesting to chart my ovulation, pee on those sticks (that never seem to work for me – according to those, I NEVER ovulate), and mark the days on the calendar in which to try (usually illustrated by two little hearts). I’ve read that the “rear-entry” position and having your husband/partner drink a cup of strong coffee is conducive to making a boy, I’ve learned that although the boys are the faster swimmers the girls are the heartiest survivors, and I’ve learned not to do it on certain days to make one or the other. Sure, we’re trying to have a boy this time – mainly since Ryan is the Last of the Mohicans, being an only child and the only Hays boy. But if it happens to be a girl, more power to us, since we already have everything that little girls need and boy would that save us a lot of cash. So either way, we’ll be happy, and as long as we get a healthy little Hays out of it, it’s all good. Sounds cliche, but at least it’s honest.<br /><br />In my fervor I’ve been reading up on all things baby and all things pregnancy, and I’m currently in what Those Who Are Trying call “the Two-Week Wait.” This is the span of two weeks from the time you ovulate to the time you get your period. It’s a bitch. I’ve been through this period already, and since I’ve already seen one positive pregnancy test as a result that crapped out on me, it’s a little stressful. Every little twitch that I feel in my belly feels like it could be SOMETHING, every day I wonder if my boobs are really sore or if it’s just my imagination. Did I pass out on the couch on Friday night because it was a long week or because I’m pregnant? Should I continue working out? Should I pick Lyric up when she asks me to? What if I do something wrong? What if I am pregnant and I miscarry again? What if I can’t carry a baby to term again? What if I miscarry further down the road, after seeing pictures of the kid in my belly and having a doctor confirm that it’s there? What if? What if? WHAT IF?<br /><br />It’s enough to drive a person somewhat insane. <br /><br />And if I am pregnant? Do I want to tell everyone right away like I did with Lyric, or do I wait? Only a few people knew about my pregnancy that ended in December. And I wish that I wouldn’t have mentioned it at all. I didn’t even tell my mom. A friend of mine that I work with just announced her pregnancy, and she found out in December. We would have had close to the same due date, in late August. I really wanted to have a summer baby. But life isn’t about getting what you want, right? It’s about getting what you need, and taking what you are given, and being happy with that. Making the most of it.<br /><br />Lyric knows that this has been a long time coming, and I wonder how she’ll deal if and/or when the day comes. She loves babies, and I know she’ll be a good big sis, but she’s already so needy and occasionally clingy. How will I deal with that? How will I continue to do both of my jobs – my full time graphic design job and my part time online instructor job? I don’t want to give either up – unless by some miracle of miracles the instructor job turns into full time (which would be a dream come true, because who DOESN’T want a full time work from home job?). How will my husband adjust to staying home in the winters with not just one, but TWO kids? Am I making a huge mistake?<br /><br />Perhaps I should title this entry “Question Mark.”<br /><br />All these questions are valid, but I can only think of the end result: a small, wriggly, pink, sweet smelling bundle of love. The fact of the matter is – for a woman who thought she never wanted to be a mother – I AM ONE. Through and through. One kid or two kids, or even three kids (although Ryan says we’re done after one more... but hey, twins run in my family). No matter how many jobs I have, the main one will always be Mom.E-Lohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09944480320326163348noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7435152.post-85082736471668423622010-01-14T10:25:00.000-05:002010-01-14T10:27:38.851-05:00Haiti<meta equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8"><meta name="ProgId" content="Word.Document"><meta name="Generator" content="Microsoft Word 11"><meta name="Originator" content="Microsoft Word 11"><link rel="File-List" href="file:///C:%5CDOCUME%7E1%5CERICA%7E1.LOR%5CLOCALS%7E1%5CTemp%5Cmsohtml1%5C01%5Cclip_filelist.xml"><o:smarttagtype namespaceuri="urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" name="country-region"></o:smarttagtype><o:smarttagtype namespaceuri="urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" name="place"></o:smarttagtype><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:worddocument> <w:view>Normal</w:View> <w:zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:punctuationkerning/> <w:validateagainstschemas/> <w:saveifxmlinvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:ignoremixedcontent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:alwaysshowplaceholdertext>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:compatibility> <w:breakwrappedtables/> <w:snaptogridincell/> <w:wraptextwithpunct/> <w:useasianbreakrules/> <w:dontgrowautofit/> </w:Compatibility> <w:browserlevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel> </w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:latentstyles deflockedstate="false" latentstylecount="156"> </w:LatentStyles> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if !mso]><object classid="clsid:38481807-CA0E-42D2-BF39-B33AF135CC4D" id="ieooui"></object> <style> st1\:*{behavior:url(#ieooui) } </style> <![endif]--><style> <!-- /* Style Definitions */ p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal {mso-style-parent:""; 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mso-bidi-language:#0400;} </style> <![endif]--><meta equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8"><meta name="ProgId" content="Word.Document"><meta name="Generator" content="Microsoft Word 11"><meta name="Originator" content="Microsoft Word 11"><link rel="File-List" href="file:///C:%5CDOCUME%7E1%5CERICA%7E1.LOR%5CLOCALS%7E1%5CTemp%5Cmsohtml1%5C03%5Cclip_filelist.xml"><o:smarttagtype namespaceuri="urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" name="country-region"></o:smarttagtype><o:smarttagtype namespaceuri="urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" name="place"></o:smarttagtype><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:worddocument> <w:view>Normal</w:View> <w:zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:punctuationkerning/> <w:validateagainstschemas/> <w:saveifxmlinvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:ignoremixedcontent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:alwaysshowplaceholdertext>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:compatibility> <w:breakwrappedtables/> <w:snaptogridincell/> <w:wraptextwithpunct/> <w:useasianbreakrules/> <w:dontgrowautofit/> </w:Compatibility> <w:browserlevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel> </w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:latentstyles deflockedstate="false" latentstylecount="156"> </w:LatentStyles> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if !mso]><object classid="clsid:38481807-CA0E-42D2-BF39-B33AF135CC4D" id="ieooui"></object> <style> st1\:*{behavior:url(#ieooui) } </style> <![endif]--><style> <!-- /* Style Definitions */ p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal {mso-style-parent:""; margin:0in; margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:12.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";} span.EmailStyle15 {mso-style-type:personal; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-ansi-font-size:10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size:10.0pt; font-family:Arial; mso-ascii-font-family:Arial; mso-hansi-font-family:Arial; mso-bidi-font-family:Arial; color:windowtext;} @page Section1 {size:8.5in 11.0in; margin:1.0in 1.25in 1.0in 1.25in; mso-header-margin:.5in; mso-footer-margin:.5in; mso-paper-source:0;} div.Section1 {page:Section1;} --> </style><!--[if gte mso 10]> <style> /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt; mso-para-margin:0in; mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:10.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-ansi-language:#0400; mso-fareast-language:#0400; mso-bidi-language:#0400;} </style> <![endif]--> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: 10pt; font-family: Arial;">The more I learn about <st1:country-region st="on"><st1:place st="on">Haiti</st1:place></st1:country-region>, and the more I can picture the suffering that must be going on there, the more my heart breaks. I know that words can’t help, but now, as a mother, I can’t imagine how scared and alone the children that have lost their parents must feel. The fact that we can just go on with our mundane lives, sending emails, updating our facebook statuses, and taking everything for granted just blows my fucking mind. Every once in a while I get jarred back into reality, and as I was reading a story just now about the people who are sleeping outside the hospital – a <a href="http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/8458516.stm">little girl with broken legs telling her dad that she’s ok</a> – I started bawling at my desk.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: 10pt; font-family: Arial;"><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: 10pt; font-family: Arial;">Whenever you feel like the trival things in life are getting you down, stop to think about that – and thank your lucky stars for what a blessed life you live.<o:p></o:p></span></p>
<br /><span style=";font-family:Arial;font-size:10pt;" ><o:p></o:p></span> E-Lohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09944480320326163348noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7435152.post-29905143228197277322009-12-29T13:45:00.002-05:002009-12-29T13:52:21.235-05:00Holidays!I remember dreading this time of year - when I worked in retail. If you go back to the 2003 posts around this time, you'll see how I was counting the days and hours when I was working at Target. I'm so glad that I'm sitting in an office, pretty much playing Farmville on Facebook all day.<br /><br />Speaking of Farmville - if you're one of those people who bitch about seeing Farmville posts all the time in your news feed, how about you "hide" those notifications, huh? Quit being lazy. Your bitching about it isn't going to stop me from leveling up and sharing my bonus, emeffer.<br /><br />I'm sitting here in my office, wondering why the hell I bothered to come to work today. I've gotten a few things done, but wow. I'm bored. I feel like drinking coffee and watching the snow fall. I have the coffee - now if I only had a window in my office.<br /><br />I started working out again yesterday. I took a month off after doing a few weeks of P90X. Here's the problem with working out - for me, anyway - once I start, I can't stop. Once I do stop, I immediately put on weight. WTF? And it's not like I'm in bad shape - I did Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred yesterday without even taking a break (except for the pushups - I still do girl ones). So I don't get it.<br /><br />Ok, I'm going to go make some coffee and stand by a window somewhere. Happy Holidays!E-Lohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09944480320326163348noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7435152.post-61845089717229978042009-12-15T15:55:00.003-05:002009-12-15T16:12:07.299-05:00Win some, lose someIn our collective efforts at baby making, we were successful. For a minute.<br /><br />I took a pregnancy test on Thursday. I could faintly see a second line. Not satisfied with that, I ran to the store and bought one of the digital readout tests - I will never resort to buying cheap pregnancy tests again. Peed on a stick, and there it was, "pregnant." Whoa! That was fast!<br /><br />I told Ryan later in the evening, and he was surprised, but proud of himself. His efforts mean a lot to him. We made plans to tell our parents on Christmas Eve, and were pretty damn excited.<br /><br />Something woke me up early Sunday, and I went to the bathroom and realized I was bleeding. Then the cramps started, which I would liken to labor pains. Not nearly as intense, but because I rarely get cramps even when I have my period, they were pretty crazy. I knew what was happening, and I was not happy. At all.<br /><br />Thankfully the cramping part didn't last long - when you're already a mom, other things distract you from your own drama - which can be a good thing sometimes. I went to the doctor yesterday and my test result was negative - and they told me my pregnancy test results could have been a false positive, or a very, very early miscarriage. I vote for the latter. I know I was pregnant - I could feel it. I recognized it. I could smell EVERYTHING.<br /><br />So it's back to the drawing board for us - and although it sucks, it makes me appreciate that I have a healthy, although BRATTY, little girl. I love her more than anything, and I'm so thankful that I have her in my life.E-Lohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09944480320326163348noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7435152.post-55048184015972583442009-12-04T14:51:00.003-05:002009-12-04T14:54:32.494-05:00Coming back ya'llYeah, I realize that I haven't had a post up in 3 months.<br /><br />BUT!<br /><br />Me and Ryan... we're trying to get preggo. So let the fun baby talk commence!<br /><br />I'm working on updating the look here, and what the hell, I might just get a domain name. We'll see.<br /><br />Lots of boring shit has been going on in my life lately, like playing Farmville on Facebook and making certificate after certificate for "Files Tech of the Month" at work and mundane shit like that. My house has been turned upside down for a few months too, and I think the long awaited bathroom remodel is about to begin. At least I hope. But at this point it's kind of like hearing that I'm going to get a raise at work - I'll believe it when I see it.<br /><br />More soon...E-Lohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09944480320326163348noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7435152.post-45452797793787185532009-10-01T10:52:00.002-04:002009-10-01T18:36:04.417-04:00Starting Over<div class="Section1"><span style="font-family:Arial;font-size:85%;"><span style=";font-family:Arial;" >October marks the beginning of the fiscal year at the company that I work at. Not that I care much about all things fiscal, but the sense of starting fresh is always a good thing. I, for one, am always starting over. For all the good it does me, I might as well just keep on keepin’ on with what I’m doing, but it’s the thought that counts right?<o:p></o:p></span></span> <p class="MsoNormal" style=""><span style="font-family:Arial;font-size:85%;"><span style=";font-family:Arial;" >Have I mentioned that Lyric, my smart, beautiful, crazy daughter has started pre-school? She’s been going for the past month, and it’s amazing to me. She loves school and often voices her disappointment about the fact that she can only go two days a week. And she’s like a sponge when it comes to new information. Do you know what I caught her doing the other night? Do you? SHE WAS WRITING HER NAME. Oh my god. How did that happen? How does my three year old know how to write? Of course, there are plenty of three year olds out there who are already reading, like, Harry Potter, and crap like that. But in that moment I felt like I had the smarter pre-schooler alive.</span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style=""><span style="font-family:Arial;font-size:85%;"><span style=";font-family:Arial;" >And when she gets frustrated? OMG. She’s worse than even her hot headed mother. I’ve been known to throw phones, kick doors, and one time I even broke the horn in my car by punching the steering wheel. I’m not even kidding you, I punched it so hard that the horn just stayed on, as if it were feeling my very emotions – blaring my angry thoughts until I pulled over and had to pull the fuse. Of course, that was after trying to punch it again to get it to stop. These days my anger fueled rages are tampered by prescription medication, but my kid? Not so much. After practicing her name a couple times and messing up a few letters, she flung the pad of paper and the pen all the way across the basement, and threw herself facedown on to the couch. But that’s pretty typical three year old behavior, right? RIGHT?</span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style=""><span style="font-family:Arial;font-size:85%;"><span style=";font-family:Arial;" >One problem that I’m faced with is her need for violence. She’s a mom abuser. Yes, I say that jokingly, but she does like to hit, push, and pinch. Particularly when she’s overly tired and doesn’t get her way. My arm just healed from a pinch that she planted on me a week ago, and last night, I went to take my book light out of her hand and she hauled off and slapped me across the face. HARD. I could feel the miniature handprint. It’s moments like those when me as a person and not as a mom bubbles to the surface and I physically see red for a moment. I swear it’s the hand of a higher power that holds me back and calms me down and allows me to say, “NO, YOU DON’T DO THAT,” and walk out of the room. Anyone but my child who would slap me would see the WRATH. Not pretty.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style=""><span style="font-family:Arial;font-size:85%;"><span style=";font-family:Arial;" >I still haven’t found the solution to the hitting/pinching/pushing problem. Thankfully there have been no reports of Lyric related violence from pre-school.</span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style=""><span style="font-family:Arial;font-size:85%;"><span style=";font-family:Arial;" >Overall, I’m amazed that this kid will be four in two months. And while I miss my cuddly baby, I’m liking the kid that’s developing, minus the violence, of course. She’s fun, and funny, and she sings! She totally lives up to her name with her musical abilities. We were watching Tarzan the other night – the one where Phil Collins does the soundtrack – and she sang along to all the songs. I was like, “how many times have you seen this?” She held up two fingers.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style=""><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4at4rtbIO1UrmuqT5Ha5Mhne9Y8QZvmYy0eZjsqceejSLlcAVatQXUt_Z_8q3XlTBxn8uAdh4w1wna4ZC-Yrb245_bHbV4wrpgBluHgM1zRrR6qoduN-GWRl8BhCXZSPdvm6O/s1600-h/20090912_1521.JPG"><img style="cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 251px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4at4rtbIO1UrmuqT5Ha5Mhne9Y8QZvmYy0eZjsqceejSLlcAVatQXUt_Z_8q3XlTBxn8uAdh4w1wna4ZC-Yrb245_bHbV4wrpgBluHgM1zRrR6qoduN-GWRl8BhCXZSPdvm6O/s320/20090912_1521.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5387763611631664114" border="0" /></a></p> <span style="font-size:85%;"><br /></span></div><div><br /><p></p></div>E-Lohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09944480320326163348noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7435152.post-54912491549939909732009-08-26T14:04:00.001-04:002009-08-26T14:05:23.582-04:00Outrageous!<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJDGAwBw01o4d2NqGbN5VazFB_K6RTurkZvn255GbofgKLO0Np6V6RIH2KT9ltrpMl0brmY6inVn05FfxkRBWcmAjxPsAhk7i8z3g-hAVSaK9a-YPTMjEKoPBzQNd1QTltMGKP/s1600-h/outrageous.jpg"><img style="cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 262px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJDGAwBw01o4d2NqGbN5VazFB_K6RTurkZvn255GbofgKLO0Np6V6RIH2KT9ltrpMl0brmY6inVn05FfxkRBWcmAjxPsAhk7i8z3g-hAVSaK9a-YPTMjEKoPBzQNd1QTltMGKP/s320/outrageous.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5374334936212904578" border="0" /></a><br /><br />I'm sure the majority of the people that are friends with me on Facebook are sick to death of me posting articles and blurbs and stuff like this... but I can't help it. I voted for change, and THAT'S WHAT I WANT.E-Lohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09944480320326163348noreply@blogger.com0